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Brunswick , Georgia, United States
I am a child of God, a wife and mother. I have been truly blessed with a wonderful and loving family; they made me who I am today. I have meet some great friends over the past few years, and without them, I wouldn't have made it though some of the hardest times in my life. I decided to start this blog because there are so many things that I want to share with those that I love. From the smiles that I get from my beautiful children each morning, to times where I can't seem to get out of bed. Enjoy!

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Saturday, February 21, 2015

"Best Mom is the Whole Wide World!"

Yep, you heard that right!!

Yesterday after picking up Addison from school, we chatted about the day and what she learned. Turns out the same everyday.... "hmmm, I can't remember."  Great, 8 hours at school, learning, playing, reading, writing..and she can't remember.  So, I began asking probing questions trying to get anything out of her. I gave up and we rode in silence for the the 15 minutes it takes to get to the daycare where the other children are.

As we pull in, park and get out of the car, Addison shouts at the top of her lungs... "YOUR THE BEST MOM IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD!!" At this point, all I see and hear is my child screaming in the middle of the parking lot and other people turning and looking. My instant reaction was to fuss at her and correct her behavior...but as I was turning to say something, I truly heard what she said.  My heart skipped and I believe stopped working for a second as I tried to gather my "stop the screaming in public before you are embarrassed" mommy mode brain.  "Addison, why do you think that?" I asked her. "Because you are," she replied as she skipped up to the door of the building not noticing me completely dumbfounded behind her.

I don't understand it. How can she think that? Can she REALLY believe that? I am the mom who feels like she is desperately trying to keep her head above the water. The mom who is so tired of schedules and organizing healthy meals and activities that she wants to throw in the towel some days. The mom who on some days, doesn't want to make the effort to bathe her children. The mom who at the end of the day, looks forward to bedtime so that she can sit in the silence that takes over the house when the children are sleeping. The mom who forgoes a shower just so she can get in bed sooner. How can I be the best mom in the world?

The best mom in the world has her stuff together. The best mom in the world always smiles, always laughs at her children's made up jokes even when they are NOT funny. The best mom in the world takes a shower everyday, wakes up early and makes breakfast, irons her husbands clothes (putting them in the dryer doesn't count) and the best mom in the world can schedule and organize everyone's activities and still have a well balanced meal at the end of the day where EVERYONE sits together and shares there day.  I AM NOT the best mom in the world by those standards.

A dear friend of mine said something to me a few weeks ago that has really stuck in my heart. She said that as moms, we beat ourselves up based on our expectations for ourselves. We are critical, and abusive and frequently find ourselves undeserving of the job we have because we don't meet the HIGH expectations that we have set for ourselves.  I have been chewing on that information for a few days trying to figure out how to change my expectations and become a mom that my children want to be around and maybe one day be a mom that I can be proud of. A mom who pushes through even when she wants to sit in a quiet room all day. A mom who understands that it is OK to neglect the pile of unfolded clothes on the couch because she chose to play with her children. A mom who laughs with her children at the dinner table even if they are eating peanut butter sandwiches for the third time that week. A mom who in the midst of exhaustion, is found perfect and wanted by her children.

Turns out, I am...    I am the best mom in HER whole wide world!